Things I would like but will never have:

"Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo" (thetomselleck) 02/05/2017 at 18:21 • Filed to: I think his account got hacked. Who is this asshole?

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A house on Grand Avenue, a well-behaved dog, and an E61 wagon.

gmctavish needs more space > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 02/05/2017 at 18:23

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Your local BMW dealer’s service center would also like you to have an E61 wagon

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > gmctavish needs more space 02/05/2017 at 18:25

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Yeah, same argument against a 6MT Allroad that I could afford to buy, but probably not afford to own.

TheTurbochargedSquirrel > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 02/05/2017 at 18:26

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Opposaurus figured that one out the hard way.

gmctavish needs more space > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 02/05/2017 at 18:31

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Same with the euro Porsche 944 I posted that seems to still be for sale...

garagemonkee > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 02/05/2017 at 18:32

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I bet you could eventually afford a house on the East side of Grand instead of the just-one-torrential-downpour-from-a-mud-slide West side. lol

Scott > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 02/05/2017 at 18:32

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If that’s the limit you choose to impose on yourself... I’m not here to judge... it’s your life. Even if I do find your choices weird and disgusting, I support those choices, and your right to make them.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > garagemonkee 02/05/2017 at 18:37

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I like sunsets. I’d take a chance. Also explains why the homes on Rucker seem to go for even more. Sunsets + distances from that vertical drop above the tracks.

LimitedTimeOnly @ opposite-lock.com > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 02/05/2017 at 18:44

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I believe that you can have a well behaved dog.

Carbon Fiber Sasquatch > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 02/05/2017 at 18:45

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Midsize luxury wagons is my favorite car

PS9 > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 02/05/2017 at 18:46

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You just aren’t being creative enough.

After the global economy is destroyed by the coming trade wars, you will be homeless. But so will the guy with the Grand Avenue house. After he leaves without paying the mortgage and the bank becomes insovlent and unable to forceably recover lost assets, you have a perfect squatting opportunity. There might be fire/property damage but you gotta take what you can get

Shock collars. Dogs act good real quick with one of those. With any luck, that guy on grand ave. will have one he never used lying around because his trophy wife divorced him after the economy made him poor, and she’s the one who wanted the dog they never got.

Now the E61 is going to be trickier. Obelisks of wealth and power will be consumed by the scores of angry unemployed who need an outlet for their rage (hence the fire/property damage I mentioned earlier). A BMW, even an old one, will make you a target. But that’s the bad news. The good news is, after the government becomes insolvent due to no one buying our T-Bills anymore and collapses under the weight of all the debt (due to the aformentioned trade war), a new government will have to be installed. The transition/recovery period will see a lot of previously enforced regulations go by the wayside...like auto import regs for example! Tanking the dollar is going to take out a lot of other currencies globally due to the reserve currency system. Previously unobtainable vehicles will be had for comparative pennies. It will be as if Tavarish had been put in charge for a little while. After all the rubble is cleared out, import shops will spring up like weeds along the east coast, and the good news is you’re already in position to take advantage before the new govt. shuts them down.

A BMW makes you a target. But a ‘Chevy’? That’s what an all american hero of the revolution drives! Just put the appropriate badges and bald eagle somewhere and you’ll be hailed as a local hero of the resistance, instead of a greedy fatcat who somehow escaped what he had coming to him.

Now, all of this working out is predicated on you surviving the coming cascade of collapses, which admittedly is quite low. But if you do, the upside couldn’t be better!

wafflesnfalafel > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 02/05/2017 at 18:48

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http://www.historylink.org/File/8579

interstate366, now In The Industry > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 02/05/2017 at 18:51

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You could probably “afford” an E61. But not an E61 M5.

Klaus Schmoll > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 02/05/2017 at 19:13

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The specimen you posted has the “M-Sport Aerodynamik” rear bumper and side skirts but not the front one. WTF? Also, shadow line > chrome line!

Orange Exige > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 02/05/2017 at 20:06

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I actually just saw a 5-series wagon today (same bodystyle so I guess an E61? idk my 5-series designations well) and I was surprised that they even existed in the U.S.

They must have sold, what, 5 of them nationwide??